Intimate feelings

Hanging on to the past

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is deemed not healthy… but sometimes I do wonder why when someone is trying not to hang on to the past but it still comes back to haunt them at unexpected moments…It’s the moment when no matter what you are doing, everything just comes back flooding in… makes you go numb and takes time to recover.. These moments can last as long as 10 mins to 30 mins or come flashing for a minute…

I have wondered why this happens if you have forgiven somebody? It’s probably because you have forgiven and not forgotten… Forgiven for your own healing, forgiven for your own progress to the next phase of life… But everything flows back in you when the person you forgave takes the other for granted and instead starts defending oneself rather than helping the other to heal completely but make the other person feel more insecure…

Its a process you wouldn’t understand unless you are the one who had decided to forgive somebody in the hope of healing but the person victimizes you… What a shame…

And hanging on to the past becomes your nomenclature as you are striving hard to come through it yet it flows back to you as you are taken for granted.

I know most of the mankind go through this but the form and relationship may be different.. so then comes the question of how to deal with it then? Someone hurt you, you forgave and you are still hurting…

The best is to come to terms with the situation and not to worry much and believe that ‘anyone cant taunt me, but I know and believe in myself and my happiness. Noone except me rules it nor will let ruin it!!’

Be brave and be you is the mantra!!

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Mummy moment

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happens unexpectedly and it could be anything ūüôā My recent mom moment was completely out of the blue!

Scene:– Conversation with his vocal music teacher about ‘vocabulary’ while I was there to pick Yuvan!

Me:- Does your child read? It really helps.. its a good habit not only for academics I think…

Tr:- Ahh I know, but my child doesn’t read much… May be because I am not a reader myself… Do you read??

Yuvan quickly quips in and says,

“My mom is a voracious reader, she reads almosy every night…” (with a sparkle in his eyes)

Tr:- Ohhh Wow…

It’s deftly a mom moment for me knowing my child knows my hobby and appreciates it and follows it! And it gave me a high! 

And for a matter of fact he knows I not only read ‘books’ but a lot of news! Reading is just not reading books!

  

Coffee and nap

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a perfect combination for sanity! I now know for sure – for me – Coffee helps in healing! A morning date with just me and it helped me to sort things in my mind… I am glad I have figured out a few ‘healing theraphy’ units thats works for me!   

A complete cracker – A boy’s thoughts of a school holiday!¬†

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Yuvan came up to me with his ever favourite Diary of a Wimpy Kid book and insisted I read the pages he pointed out! 

My reaction after reading – ‘Rolled Eyes!’ and I laughed out heartily!    

     

But I am glad that he treats me as his friend and shared this with me and we laughed together! I am so happy we read together!!

After a tough week or so, this has been such a reassuring moment to know that your parenting has been good and we can achieve a lot more together!

And he showed this to me too and said, ‘Amma… This is sooo you…’  

We both laughed out so loud hysterically!! I feel sooo good!

I am thankful to God for this bond and Yuvan… I wish we can be like this throughout! Love you little man!! I am super happy that he is able to share what he feels right out of his heart to me! 

I am going to try and make an effort to be a more fun mom! 

My Regular Friday date 

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My Regular Friday date is handsome, someone who is quite harsh at times, loving at times, understanding mostly, attractive but demanding at times, someone who is genuine and talkative, who has strong opinions…and the list goes on…

He is my usual companion — for many may think an unusual friday date – I have grown to appreciate it – I like being with him for some quality time – mostly starts with a dinner that he craves for on that day or what I crave for – a little catch up on everyday things – many a times book browsing and buying afterwards – and a little bit more tv before winding up for the day with loving cuddles!

Sounds perfect for a Friday night date?? Thanks Yuvan, my dear son for being my regular Friday date!  

Love you young man and cherishing these small but precious moments!!   

Retrospection

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A simple train ride – A friday evening – only myself me – driverless – front compartment – my train of thoughts…

 An efficient cycle that is perfect; useful for everyone; yet its own cycle is just endless with more and more expectations; noone appreciates its for  its perfections but flaws noticed!  

The man who made the difference – LKY

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I have known/read about this great man only very little before we moved to SG, but my knowledge and appreciation for this man has grown leaps and bounds over the years. He is the only politician who has inspired me so far in the 33 years of my life and the only politician for whom I shed tears and was engulfed in raw emotions when he passed away on the 23rd March 2015.

It has been a historic experience of emotions for me throughout the last 7 days for the great man Lee Kuan Yew, whom I have come to appreciate soooo much after being in Singapore for 10 yrs to date.

His dreams and the will to succeed as a nation is what that shaped Singapore! A little red dot that has been transformed into a force to reckon with forever! ! I have been fortunate enough to experience the difference he has made to this country, which I proudly call my second home!

The experience starts with first and foremost the safety – I can walk/take a cab ride in the streets all alone with no fear at anytime of the day/night, a super efficient, corruption free and organised system (which I believe as he believed is the key to Singapore’s succees) in every single thing that you can name and the list goes on…

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Yuvan and myself managed to pay the last respects and a tribute at a community center. I teared as I wrote the message. I was pretty surprised at the message Yuvan wrote in a quick farewell card pressed for time and in the condolence book. I have never propagated my views to him, but I am glad he knew who LKY was and what he meant to Singapore and to us. He requested to stay for a little longer to watch his videos, and off course I readily agreed – Valuable life’s lessons!

Over the last week, I was fortunate to read/watch a lot about this great man LKY, every single thing made me respect him much more and I am sure I have learned a lot of life’s lessons from him!

He was not only a passionate great leader and a powerful orator- but also a good husband, a good father and a human being. I was bowled over by his dedication towards his wife!

What a Leader, what a ‘doer’ and Whatttt a¬†Man! There won’t be another man like LKY again!

I am Grateful and Thankful!¬†He has touched my family’s and my life indirectly! Respects and Salutes!¬†

A man, a leader

who inspired me!

A man, a leader

who will continue to inspire me!

A man, a leader

who has amazed me!

A man, a leader

Whom I will look upon as a role model!

A man, a leader

whom I will never forget!

RIP LKY!